The Fire Inside
by madfoxzz
Summary: It was a grizzly case, but after what Sara's been through, maybe she needs to let herself feel alive…


**The Fire Inside**

**Disclaimer: *sigh* you know that if I owned these characters that you'd be seeing this on film right? Right. They are owned by a lot of other people but they aren't mine.**

**Spoilers: Parallel universe after "Living Doll" 7x24 but no specific details/spoilers**

* * *

Sara sighed and looked at Sofia. "I hate when it's kids".

Sofia looked down at the charred remains through what used to be the doorframe of a shack in the mountains outside of Vegas. Smoke and ash swirled and drifted through the air, made worse by a morning air conversion over the valley. The flame front of the wildfire was miles away, but the pressing weight of the smoke brought with it a choking sense of unease.

"Mice with matches," Sofia commented.

"Kids playing with fire?" Sara said, "Yeah, maybe, but the fire investigator said there were inconsistencies and wanted us to look closer."

"Mmmm. Like this V pattern from accelerant on the outside wall here?" Sofia crouched down and studied the blackened wall. "Why would kids playing set fire to the outside wall and then go inside? Most accidental fire starters see it is out of their control and run away, hide or both…but they don't hang around to get caught and they certainly don't go inside the burning building if they had just lit the outside wall. The investigator said the wildfire originated with this shack?" Sara nodded. "So they didn't start the fire somewhere else and run here to hide…"

* * *

Sara stood outside of the motel room she was sharing with Sofia and hesitated. It shouldn't matter - they were both women, both adults, no reason to try hunting down another room when most places were full of hikers and campers flushed off the mountain by the blaze. So why was she hesitating? If she was completely honest with herself it was because Sofia's gaze had locked on hers when they had pulled over to look at the map on the way up here. They had been crowded close to each other and the hood of the truck trying to keep the map from blowing away when Sofia had laughed and looked up. Their gazes locked and… and Sara didn't know what she had seen for certain. She had had that feeling in the pit of her stomach before now, but she had ignored it. It was simple enough when one didn't have a social life to speak of.

Now though, things were different…after nearly being killed she had spent a lot of time with nothing to do but think. She had decided life is too short. She broke up with Grissom the next day because she could no longer wait for him to figure out how to express his feelings, and she was no longer sure of her own. How can you be with someone who counts a sneeze as an emotion? She had followed his logic on that obtuse point…but still.

She had unconsciously watched Sofia since she had come to Vegas CSI, craved those blue eyes turning in her direction, feeling a leap of joy when showing up at a crime scene to see she was there. If she saw Sofia before the scene, before the blood, before she had to focus on making order out of death and chaos, the day always seemed to go along better.

Not that she would ever actually do anything about this feeling. Sofia was her co-worker and probably not interested anyway. She just didn't let her thoughts wander too far and focused on the work. Maybe someday she'd meet a woman and live happily ever after. Until then, at least figuring out that she just wasn't interested in being physical with men explained why she had always cut Grissom off when he actually tried to express a feeling. Deep down, she didn't **want** to be closer to him. Maybe she was in love with the idea of him more than the actual physical…details.

Sara brought her mind back to slightly more pleasant, if unrequited pastures. Sofia had looked up into her eyes and she thought she had seen something else for a second. But she didn't dare believe it. True, they'd grown in their friendship, and developed a sound working relationship... They'd even gone running a few times recently. Sofia was very patient with how slow Sara had gotten after the injury and rehab, but not overly attentive. Sara had never gotten that vibe from her until today, but they'd never been so close either. An unbidden thought entered her mind of Sofia's side pressed against her and her voice in her ear as they had looked at that map. It made the back of her neck prickle uncomfortably.

Normally nothing could distract her from a case, but living through the ordeal she had wasn't normal either. She just needed to focus. She closed her eyes, and shook those thoughts out of her head. Believing that she had talked herself down, she grabbed the doorknob. It was instantly ripped from her hand. Her eyes flew open and there stood Sofia inches from her face.

They both took a step back.

"What are you doing out here? I thought you were just going to grab a file. You've been out here for like, 20 minutes," Sofia asked, a bemused look surfaced on her face. She smiled her crooked smile and cocked her head to the side waiting for an answer. Sara composed herself, but couldn't think of anything to say. Sofia held up the ice bucket and indicated the ice machine a few doors down the outside wall, "Ice," she said.

Sara stood unmoved trying to casually not look at Sofia's face, which would have worked fine if her gaze hadn't continued to try to rest elsewhere on the blonde's body. Sofia's smile grew bigger at Sara's new behavior. "I need to…," the blonde looked around the doorframe Sara was blocking and back at her, "unless **you** want to…Here," She pressed the ice bucket into Sara's hands.

Trying to grip the bucket and her file Sara snapped out of her daze, "Oh yeah, sure. Is that ankle bothering you?"

"Not bad. It'll be fine, but I think I'd better ice it so it doesn't stiffen up.

"Well here," Sara handed her the case file, "I'll be right back."

"Thanks," Sofia said to Sara's back. Laughing to herself, she closed the door without latching it, then turned and flopped down on the bed, pausing before grabbing the TV remote to stuff a pillow under her twisted ankle.

Outside scooping the ice into the bucket Sara reprimanded herself. "You idiot," She mumbled, "What do you think you're doing?" The ice rattled angrily in the bottom of the plastic bucket, "I'll tell you what you're doing…you're being an idiot!"

"You know," said a voice to her left, "answering your own questions is the first sign of madness."

Startled, Sara looked up and saw an elderly man standing in the doorway of his room smoking a cigarette. She saluted him with the ice bucket as she walked past him and back to the room. "Thanks for that," she said with a sarcastic smile, "That's just what I needed to worry about."

"Just sayin'." He called after her.

"Yeah, 'just sayin'," Sara muttered back as she opened the room door.

Sofia looked up, "Who are you talking to?"

Sara looked over, gave her a tired smile and sighed, "Myself." She grabbed a handful of ice and added, "Here, let me find a bag for you to put this in."

Sofia smiled back, "Thanks."

* * *

Sara turned away from the window that separated the observation room from the interrogation room burning with fury. She watched the Fletchers being lead away past the door as Sofia entered.

"Who the fuck do they think they are?" Sara spat, "Taking those kids lives as if they didn't mean anything but a monthly check from the state? They mean something. They could have grown up to be Doctors or pilots or writers… or anything." Tears jumped to her eyes, "Or CSI's." She held her palm to her forehead and tried to choke back the tears. A sob stuck in her throat and hurt, her body shook. "Foster kids mean something. They are something special."

What Sara was saying and why she got so angry and vehement about this case dawned on Sofia. Of course, she must have been a foster child once. She took Sara's shoulders and turned to look her square in the face. "Of course they are something. And **you** are something special too. Those people are going away for a long time. That is if they avoid the death penalty, and you put them there. They won't hurt any more kids Sara, because of you. Josh, Jarren and Sandy are gone, but think of all the kids you saved." Sofia searched Sara's shining eyes and said more softly, "Ok? **You are** someone special Sara." Her nerve failed and she looked down. They hadn't ever been quite this close and it only intensified the feelings she had been trying to ignore. She wanted to comfort and protect this woman more than anything.

Sara knew Sofia was right, and it was jarring how quickly she had understood Sara's words. Her anger dissipated. Her eyes still shining she looked down at the top of Sofia's head. She reached up and touched the blonde's chin. Sofia looked back up and Sara was finally sure of what she saw there. She swallowed and ran her finger up the line of the blonde's jaw.

Sofia squeezed her eyes shut and exhaled, the tension visibly draining from her shoulders and face as the air escaped her mouth. She had wanted that touch so long… She opened her eyes and took Sara's hand away. "Sara, don't…..don't start something you aren't sure you want."

Holding her gaze, Sara raised her other hand and ran it up the back of the blonde's neck and into her hair. Leaning forward, she brushed Sofia's lips with her own. Her breath quickened and Sofia made a noise in her throat. Pulling back an inch, eyes searching Sara's face, Sofia asked, "Are you sure?"

"Yes," Sara whispered urgently, her eyes as black as a mountain night.

Letting go of her hand, Sofia leaned through the space between them and kissed her. Soft lips meeting soft lips, gently at first, but soon they were crashing into each other, mouths searching for more, tongues seeking entry. Sara ached with a hunger and as Sofia's tongue passed her lips the want flared in her chest. Their bodies drew together and for a second neither was sure she would ever be able to pull away. Sofia reveled in the taste of Sara's mouth, the smell of her hair and the feel of her breasts crushed into her chest just above her own. She felt Sara's breath catch and realized she was holding her own as well. When they did pull apart, they were both breathless and panting.

"I…We should - probably…" Sofia said motioning toward the file on the table behind Sara.

"Yeah, let's… get out of here," Sara said picking up the folder, then more quietly she added, "We still have that hotel room for another night… It's a long drive back to the city and we're both pretty tired…maybe we should rest before heading out."

"Um, yeah," Sofia said, trying not to think about what Sara was or was not implying. She turned and walked out, Sara followed. It didn't take long for them to sign off on the forms and log the evidence in. As Sara watched the clerk carry away the last box, the gravity of the case hit her again. She sighed heavily and Sofia looked up with an expression of concern.

"I'm ok," Sara said noticing Sofia's look, and propped a smile up on her face.

Sofia was unconvinced. "Let's go," she said handing the form to the clerk. She heard him stamp the paper as the door swung shut behind them.

They walked to the truck without speaking. As Sara slid into the passenger seat Sofia broke the silence, "Ok, so what was that sigh about."

"Oh it's a lot of things I guess," Sara said heavily. "Everything those kids were, everything that anyone will remember of them is in those evidence boxes locked away in storage." She paused, "and maybe a little survivor's guilt too. My foster parents were kind. It wasn't the happiest thing, but at least there was…well are…people in this world that cared for me and encouraged me. These kids didn't have anyone like that." As Sara finished they pulled into the motel parking lot. Getting out of the truck she smiled a real smile this time and added, "Thanks for letting me talk it out. I feel better."

Sofia stopped at the motel room door and looked up, studying the sunset. It was blood red from the smoke and ash in the atmosphere. She'd been burned before, she thought with a wry smile, no pun intended, and she didn't want to make the same mistake again. "Sara…If you want to be alone before we go back, I could find another room or sleep in the truck. You've been through a lot recently…" She trailed off, realizing she was speaking as much to herself as to Sara.

Sara stepped around Sofia and turned to face her. The red of the sunset glowed in Sofia's blond hair. She was beautiful and tough, kind – but didn't take crap from anyone. She was the kind of person Sara was and wanted to be all rolled into one, and she smelled and tasted like…spearmint? Must be the gum since neither of them wore perfume, but it was nice all the same. Sara smiled into her eyes, "I'm really alright. Please let me feel something good, something light – something alive."

Sara licked her lips and Sofia thought it was the most beautiful thing in the world.

"Please. I survived," Sara continued, "but I haven't really felt like I am still alive until now. I want to be with you." With that Sara took a step forward, forcing Sofia back and into the door. Sofia's head hit Sara's hand before it hit the wood. Sara pressed in tasting her lips and sliding her tongue between Sofia's teeth when all of the other woman's muscles seemed to melt. Sara smiled as Sofia's weight pushed against her, desire rising in her throat. She broke away and brushed her lips across a cheek, running them down and savoring her neck.

As Sofia tipped her head to the side, Sara pulled the collar of her shirt aside and nibbled her shoulder. The blond took a deep breath, shoved her hand in her pocket, fished out the key and somehow got it into the lock beside her. She turned the knob and they broke apart as they nearly fell into the room. Sara reached back and slammed the door behind them.

"Madness…," the old man said, leaning against his doorframe again, smoking and listening to the ice machine crunch. He flicked an ash on the sidewalk and with a self satisfied smile he added, "I told her so."

Sara faced Sofia as the door slammed, suddenly unsure. So far everything made sense. It felt natural, but where to from here?

Sofia understood the confused look Sara was giving her. Stepping close again she whispered, "Have you been with a woman before?"

Sara's gaze dropped, studying Sofia's body. Now that she admitted this desire, she craved the place where her neck became her shoulder, the rise of her breasts under the white button down shirt, her hips and long, strong legs. She wanted to touch this woman, to hear her moan in pleasure, not frighten her off or appear inept, but she answered with an honest, "No," and looked up to meet her eyes again.

Sofia saw the worry in those deep eyes, "That's ok, we'll go slow. If you feel uncomfortable tell me." She reached out and cupped Sara's cheek, drawing her close again.

Sara swallowed, fighting back a sigh of relief, "Ok," she said, not mentioning that the most discomfort she was feeling right now was the burning desire to get to Sofia's skin.

Sofia advanced; she grabbed Sara's wrists and held them against the door next to her ears as she devoured her lips. Pressing her full weight against Sara, she slid a thigh between her legs. Sara moaned and settled against it, her hips shifting in an achingly slow rhythm. Sofia felt Sara's temperature rise.

Sara felt it as a slow smoldering heat under her skin, nerves firing like cinders in the wind, landing and setting new fires within her.

Sofia released a hand to brush a lock of brown hair off of Sara's neck. Trailing her fingers over her skin, she left Sara's lips and blew a puff of air into her ear. Her teeth found the edge, which she kissed and nibbled. She gave it a little tug before she let it go causing Sara to growl. Moving down she pressed little circles in Sara's throat with her tongue, tasting the Nevada sun and sweat on her flesh.

Breathless Sara reached behind Sofia, her fingertips finding the metal badge, the leather gun holster and finally settling on the back of Sofia's shirt, which she pulled free. Sliding her palm over Sofia's skin, her breath constricted and she panted, "I want to feel you inside me," in Sofia's ear, pressing herself harder into the blonde's thigh.

Sofia gasped, "You will." Sara let out an open mouthed whimper and reached up finding the clasp of Sofia's bra. Taking it in her fingers she popped it open. Sofia pulled her attention from Sara's neck and sighed as the same hand crept across her ribs and over her breast. Toying with a nipple, Sara covered the blonde's mouth with her own. She pinched a little harder and felt Sofia's moan on her lips.

Sofia pulled back and saw the light in Sara's eyes. She no longer had any doubt as to whether this was what Sara really wanted. Releasing Sara's other hand she reached up and loosed the first button of Sara's shirt letting her fingertips linger on her collarbone. With both hands free Sara took the back of Sofia's shirt again and pulled it up over her head, dropping it on the floor next to them.

With a thinly veiled smile Sofia turned serious and pressed into Sara again, her thigh creating another shock of pleasure through Sara's clit, who moaned and leaned into it. Forehead to forehead the blond said, "No fair," and reached behind Sara, grabbed her shirt and pulled it over her ears. Stepping back she appraised the brunette as she let her bra slide the rest of the way off her arms and onto the floor.

Sara, feeling the other woman's gaze roll over her like a tangible heat, simply stood and waited. Kneeling down Sofia placed her hands on Sara's hips and kissed her lowest rib sliding her hands over the soft skin of her lower back. Sara heard the thump of her head hitting the door as her body involuntarily arched toward the warmth of Sofia's mouth. Standing slowly, she trailed her lips up Sara's ribcage, to her sternum and finally to her collarbone. She pressed her full weight against Sara again, only this time it was skin to skin. Sara whimpered as Sofia whispered, "I think it would be safer if we got you somewhere with a little padding…the bed perhaps?"

Feeling Sofia's nipples pressed against her bare skin was almost more than her mind could comprehend so Sara simply made a noise of assent. Taking her hand Sofia lead her to the edge of the bed and sat her down. She caressed Sara's shoulders, as Sara reached up and touched Sofia's cheek, studying her face. Sofia reached around behind her to unhook her bra, Sara leaned in and kissed her hard. She felt her bra open and Sofia's nails down the length of her back. Taking Sara's shoulders again the blond pressed her down until she imprinted the mattress.

Sofia kissed Sara's clavicle, followed the hollow down and breathed over the brunette's breast. A muffled whine came from Sara's throat as the blonde ran her tongue over the tip of her breast and paused to take it into her mouth. Sucking in the tight knot of flesh, her hands moving to Sara's belt, seeking entry.

Arching her back into Sofia's mouth Sara found her voice, "I am so wet for you."

"Mmmm," sighed Sofia smiled, taking her time, making Sara wait as her lips traveled across her midsection, pulling one side of her jeans down and kissing her hipbone. "But I want to explore every inch of you first - and I'm on top."

Sara groaned and sat up. Grabbing hold of the blonde's shoulders she rolled her over and pinned her to the bed. "I don't think you understand." She said to Sofia's smiling, surprised face, "I think I've waited long enough, and I don't want to be pushy, but," She let her eyes roam over the other woman's naked torso, and took a deep breath, "you drive me crazy."

Smiling up at Sara the blonde thought about all of the things she could do to this woman, and settled on more than a few. She liked her, she was smart, hot headed and went for what she wanted - even if that made her impatient - it was still sexy as hell. "Then be crazy Sara," she said.

Sara leaned in and lightly kissed her lips, then progressed down, laying those lips over a nipple here, a rib there, then nipped at the blonde's side, only pausing when she found denim. She slid off the side of the bed to kneel and smiling she grabbed the belt with her teeth and pulled it loose. She bit and shook the button loose and then grabbed the zipper and pulled it down. She kissed and ran her tongue over the coarse hair she revealed as she slowly wiggled the clothing free from Sofia's body. Moving down to kiss her inner thigh Sara pulled her own pants free. Sara could smell how wet Sofia was and she wanted more, but Sofia sat up and gently pushed her back.

"Can I look at you?" She said.

"Um, yes?," Sara stood and Sofia caught her breath.

Reaching out she pulled Sara on top of her, "You are exquisite," she said in Sara's ear as Sara pulled herself up on her hands and knees above her, smiling back.

"Thank you, but you see, now **I'm** on top and I…" Sara didn't get to finish her sentence as her weight-bearing arm was pulled out from underneath her and Sofia rolled on top.

"You don't play fair," Sara gasped as Sofia straddled her.

"No, maybe not," Sofia said with a mischievous grin. Sara tried the same maneuver but Sofia simply rocked her weight back on her knees and caught Sara's hand. She brought the wrist up to her lips and began to suck and nibble it while sinking down to find Sara's clit. Setting Sara's hand free, she took a lick and heard the sharp hiss of inhaled breath from her lover. The sound spurred her on; she plunged her mouth into Sara and with the flat of her tongue pulled her clit into her mouth. Sara's leg muscles rolled and Sofia held on, sliding her arms under Sara's thighs and wrapping them around her hips.

She lapped and sucked as Sara gasped and moaned.

She let go of one of Sara's thighs and slid two fingers inside her. Groaning Sara ignited and arched against her. She moaned each time the blonde slid inside. Sofia smiled and continued her ministrations, lapping and sucking, the sounds coming from the other woman fueling her, getting her wetter with each stroke. "Harder…" Sara breathed, Sofia plunged her face and hand in deeper, "oh yess – don't stop," the blond could feel Sara's muscles tensing, "Please, please, please, don't stop," Sara pleaded then caught her breath.

Sofia felt the warm wetness clamp around her fingers as Sara's muscles flexed and spasmed. She placed a hand on Sara's stomach and when Sara was still and panting up at the ceiling, gave her a final lap. Sara's muscles quivered. Sofia grabbed a handful of cheap motel sheet and pulled it over them as she slid the full length of her body up the brunette's. She placed an arm under the brunette's head and held her close until her breath slowed.

When her eyes finally agreed to focus Sara looked into Sofia's face. "Mmmm," she sighed and smiled. The blonde smiled back. "Kiss me," Sara whispered.

Surprised, Sofia hesitated, "Are you sure you…" Sara reached up and pulled her down muffling the next words with her lips. Sofia's taste mingled with her own in her mouth. When their lips parted, more than anything she wanted to know what Sofia tasted like too.

She pushed up, got her elbows underneath her and, rolled the blond over to lay on top of her. She straddled Sofia's thigh and pressed herself into it. Sofia moaned and Sara could see the conflict in her eyes. "Sara…I…"

Sara pressed her thigh firmly against Sofia's hot core, letting the heat sink into her skin, and leaned over, whispering in the other woman's ear, "What do I have to do to convince you this is what I want? Why are you fighting what you want? Please let me, guide me."

Sofia bit the inside of her cheek and consented. Sara leaned over and encircled a nipple with her lips. Bringing her lips together and then pulling them away she blew cold air over it and watched the skin clench. Stroking the other with her hand she descended taking it all in her mouth sliding it back down her tongue slowly as Sofia shuddered. Nipping at one, she lightly pinched the other and the blond let out another moan.

Sara trailed her lips over Sofia's skin as she moved down. Looking up when got back to the small patch of blond hair, she found those blue eyes watching her. Locking that gaze she leaned down and parted Sofia's folds, drawing the flat of her tongue in a long stroke over her clit.

Sofia clenched her teeth, but a stifled shout still escaped as her body shuddered. Sara rolled her tongue over and lapped, Sofia's hips rocked, pressing into Sara's hungry mouth.

Sara reached her hand up and drew it back down Sofia's side. Sofia took it and folded the two smaller fingers over. Sara took her hand away and placed it just inside, just so the blonde could feel it, but not penetrating, not yet. Now that she knew what to do she wanted to hear Sofia scream.

Sofia's back arched, she panted and each breath caught in her throat. "Please Sara," she begged. She reached down and took a handful of Sara's hair, pulling her face away. Sara looked up and saw eyes like ice pleading with her.

"Sara please," Sofia's voice was husky and breathless, "Fuck me."

Sara was torturing her. Her hand didn't move as Sofia pulled her back up to her own mouth. Just as their lips met Sara delved inside causing Sofia to shatter and let out a cry. An array of tingles exploded through her and her muscles tightened around Sara's fingers.

Sara watched Sofia's face as the blonde closed her eyes. She pulled out and pressed back inside hard. Sofia's breath caught and she arched again against Sara's body. Repeating this motion, letting Sofia set the tempo, she enveloped the blonde's mouth with her own. Her tongue sought and gained entry to Sofia's mouth as her hand pressed down harder. She moved her fingers inside. Sofia cried out into her lips.

Catching a breath she whispered, "more…" Looking up she saw Sara's eyes were black, all of her focus on the blonde beneath her hand. Without moving a muscle in her face, Sara added a third finger and pressed back inside. Sofia's pace increased. Sara responded pushing inside her still further. Sofia felt her muscles clench, orgasm building. She drove her hips down and gasped. Behind closed eyes she saw sparks dance as her muscles shuddered, her breath held.

Watching, Sara's chest tightened as Sofia bit her lip and the muscles relaxed across the blonde's face. Then Sofia's smile teased her lips again. Sara moved over to lie beside her and held her as their breathing stilled.

As Sofia snuggled into the hollow of Sara's throat and faded to sleep, she hoped this was real.

Sara hoped they hadn't just really screwed up their friendship.

Both women realized that they were willing to try.


End file.
